Great turn out today.
Comedians and people who pretend to be comedians:
Wali Collins
Dan Allen
Neil Potter
Seymour Swan
Luke Cunningham
Brian McGuiness
Jeff Cerelli
Willie Morales
Comedy-Related:
Julio
Troy
Original Sunday Crew:
Brian Wilson
Romel
Esquire
Nick "Anderson"
Non-Comedy (Civilians):
Vinny (Luke's friend)
Jimmy (Luke's friend)
Andy (Troy's friend)
Corey
Miraculously, the games started on time. A total of eight full court games to 19 were played today. The first game was in the same spirit of UNC crushing Washington State 68-47 in this year's Sweet Sixteen. Potter, Nick "Anderson", Esquire, Cerelli and Allen easily looked like a first seed team. Their three point ability was unstoppable. If this was a live version of SNES NBA Jam, Cerelli would have been engulfed in flames and the announcer would have cried out, "He's on fire!"
Sadly, that trip to the playoffs ended quickly in the second game just like the date-raping, probably racist Psycho T and his Tar Heels did when they lost to Kansas in the Final Four.
The new team to beat was Cunningham, Seymour, Wilson, Corey and Willie.
They broke (or tied. The ABA staff reporters are review the archives now) new ground in ABA history. They won six consecutive games. They could have made a record and won seven in a row but two of the dynasty team members' testicles atrophied in their body as they threw in the towel and said, "We're tired."
Allen and "Anderson" joined their team and won the final game of the day. Allen was overheard saying, "I didn't realize I was on enemy's team until halfway through. If I would have known in the beginning, I wouldn't have played as hard."
Uncharacteristically for ABA games, there were several arguments, especially in Game 6 (the fifth for the winning team). The score was 18-18. Both teams were extremely tired and had a minimum of six critical turnovers preventing a win. The court became gridlocked with face-to-face arguing over a disagreement of someone who was inside the line but threw it at an opposing player who was out-of-bounds.
Players-in-waiting started to create a fight bracket hoping to see some real punches. Cunningham was a first seed pick since he resembles the wrestler The Undertaker. Even though McGuiness is also 6'6" 225lbs, he was a fourth seed because he resembles Soda Popinski. Oddly, tiny little Wilson (also known as "The Mormon", "Yellow" or "11") was a first seed due to his tenacity.
Fortunately (and unfortunately), no faces were punched and the game continued. There was one more awkward moment when Willie travelled and then was fouled by Esquire.
Other notes:
Allen appreciated Luke's friend Vinnie for coming out and making him feel taller and validated by allowing Allen to deliver a handful of demoralizing blocks.
In a post game interview with Collins, he was appalled by his performance and said, "I can't believe I only made one basket."
MVP:
Tie between Willie and Wilson
Sunday, April 06, 2008
Sunday, September 10, 2006
WEEK 31 ASTORIA
Attendance:
Rob O'Reilly
Max Lance
Ray Devito
Dan Allen
Brett Anderson
Nate Bargatze
Jay Oakerson
Steve
Jon Fisch
MVP:
Brett Anderson
Recap:
Brett was a force to be reckoned with in the low post. At one point, Nate was trying to gaurd him. Brett's teammates: Rob, Jay and Ray all cleared out, standing at the 3point line and letting Brett take Nate one on one. Several times, Brett scored against his undersized opponent. Finally, Nate gave his team a hilarious pep talk.
"Everybody's just clearing out!" screamed Nate with a Southern twang.
"Yeah, no shit," laughs Jay. "You're trying to gaurd someone two feet taller."
"If we help out, they'll shoot a three," explains Nate's teammate Dan.
"Let them! You'd rather have him take a lay-up?" freaks out Nate.
Finally, the rest of Nate's team helped out on defense and later realized nobody but Jay could hit a three. Nate's squad won the best-of-three rubber match.
Brett Anderson's new animal spirit is the gorilla.
Post by Rob O'Reilly
Rob O'Reilly
Max Lance
Ray Devito
Dan Allen
Brett Anderson
Nate Bargatze
Jay Oakerson
Steve
Jon Fisch
MVP:
Brett Anderson
Recap:
Brett was a force to be reckoned with in the low post. At one point, Nate was trying to gaurd him. Brett's teammates: Rob, Jay and Ray all cleared out, standing at the 3point line and letting Brett take Nate one on one. Several times, Brett scored against his undersized opponent. Finally, Nate gave his team a hilarious pep talk.
"Everybody's just clearing out!" screamed Nate with a Southern twang.
"Yeah, no shit," laughs Jay. "You're trying to gaurd someone two feet taller."
"If we help out, they'll shoot a three," explains Nate's teammate Dan.
"Let them! You'd rather have him take a lay-up?" freaks out Nate.
Finally, the rest of Nate's team helped out on defense and later realized nobody but Jay could hit a three. Nate's squad won the best-of-three rubber match.
Brett Anderson's new animal spirit is the gorilla.
Post by Rob O'Reilly
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Week 29 ASTORIA
Attendance:
Rob O'Reilly
Max Lance
Ted Alexandro
Ted's friend Jim
6 random kids
MVP:
Alexandro
Recap:
You could feel it in the hot summer air: hoop dreams. A call to destiny that Ted Alexandro knows all too well.
In the opening game of “21,” O’Reilly took an early 14-5-4 lead against Alexandro and Lance. With fanciful Irish moves and a behind-the-back juke opponents call The O’Reilly Factor, Rob scored his 18th point and thought he had his victory sealed.
But Alexandro had other plans. After Lance’s skillful alley-oop knocked Rob back down to thirteen, Alexandro began dropping rainbows on his leprechaun-like challengers (because of Rob’s ethnicity and Max’s height). Like a pot of gold, his shot was spectacular, and gave him the victory.
In the following games, Alexandro joined an unstoppable alliance with Mike (a tiny black point) and O’Reilly, or “Kurt” as the urban players have deemed him. This “board name” is based on Rob’s goggles being reminiscent of the Lakers’ Kurt Rambis.
At one point, Ted’s team was down 20-10 in a game to 21. Max Lance had made several good jumpers and had led his team to game point. During the comeback of the century, Alexandro dropped 2 threes in a row.
At 20-19 (game point), a heated controversy erupted when Ted’s friend Jim called a foul for using raised arms while boxing out. When Team Alexandro started over with the ball, Mike speedily cut to the basket and made the final lay-up.
Post by Rob O'Reilly
Rob O'Reilly
Max Lance
Ted Alexandro
Ted's friend Jim
6 random kids
MVP:
Alexandro
Recap:
You could feel it in the hot summer air: hoop dreams. A call to destiny that Ted Alexandro knows all too well.
In the opening game of “21,” O’Reilly took an early 14-5-4 lead against Alexandro and Lance. With fanciful Irish moves and a behind-the-back juke opponents call The O’Reilly Factor, Rob scored his 18th point and thought he had his victory sealed.
But Alexandro had other plans. After Lance’s skillful alley-oop knocked Rob back down to thirteen, Alexandro began dropping rainbows on his leprechaun-like challengers (because of Rob’s ethnicity and Max’s height). Like a pot of gold, his shot was spectacular, and gave him the victory.
In the following games, Alexandro joined an unstoppable alliance with Mike (a tiny black point) and O’Reilly, or “Kurt” as the urban players have deemed him. This “board name” is based on Rob’s goggles being reminiscent of the Lakers’ Kurt Rambis.
At one point, Ted’s team was down 20-10 in a game to 21. Max Lance had made several good jumpers and had led his team to game point. During the comeback of the century, Alexandro dropped 2 threes in a row.
At 20-19 (game point), a heated controversy erupted when Ted’s friend Jim called a foul for using raised arms while boxing out. When Team Alexandro started over with the ball, Mike speedily cut to the basket and made the final lay-up.
Post by Rob O'Reilly
Sunday, July 16, 2006
Game Week 28 | MANHATTAN
Attendance:
Potter
Allen
Gurnell
Devito
Seymour
Wali
Shasha
Cody
Scott
Cobb
Nate
MVPs:
Devito and Seymour
Arguments:
In game four of seven, Devito brought his team back into the game with four consecutive three point shots but somehow the opposing team managed to pull of the win. Rumor has it that the opposing team shaved off points from Devito's team to seal their victory.
Other Observations:
Potter and Allen were not pleased with their four wins and three losses. When paired together they normally deliver a powerful force. Something was missing and it was mediocre at best.
Everyone felt better about themselves as they watched Allen make a "fast" break-away for the final basket of the game. Someone said it looked like Dustin Diamond (Screech from Saved by the Bell) doing an impression of Gandalf as he slithered side-to-side slowly down the court, came to a dead stop and pogo-sticked jumped straight up and made an easy lay-up.
Potter
Allen
Gurnell
Devito
Seymour
Wali
Shasha
Cody
Scott
Cobb
Nate
MVPs:
Devito and Seymour
Arguments:
In game four of seven, Devito brought his team back into the game with four consecutive three point shots but somehow the opposing team managed to pull of the win. Rumor has it that the opposing team shaved off points from Devito's team to seal their victory.
Other Observations:
Potter and Allen were not pleased with their four wins and three losses. When paired together they normally deliver a powerful force. Something was missing and it was mediocre at best.
Everyone felt better about themselves as they watched Allen make a "fast" break-away for the final basket of the game. Someone said it looked like Dustin Diamond (Screech from Saved by the Bell) doing an impression of Gandalf as he slithered side-to-side slowly down the court, came to a dead stop and pogo-sticked jumped straight up and made an easy lay-up.
Friday, July 14, 2006
Game Week 26 | ASTORIA
Attendence:
Lissow
Alexandro
Devito
Nate
Scott(newcomer)
Allen
Moody
Luis
Dave
Randolf T.
Lance
Play of the Day:
Alexandro saddled up behind the three point line. Being a powerful scorer from that range, the opposing team stepped up their defense. Alexandro recieved a bad pass. Allowing Allen to steal the ball with his left hand and drive by on Alexandro's right side for a fast break-away to the other end of the court. With the speed and agility of the old Shaq moving down court, Allen awkwardly dribbled down to the unguarded basket. Alexandro was hot on his back. Allen slowed his pace as if a wizard had cast a Slow spell and he was wading his way through invisible molasses. He leaped from a two-footed jump stop, slam dunked the ball with two hands, hung on the rim, and yelled a battle cry at the same decibal of Wesley being tortured by the Six-Fingered Man in Princess Bride.
Overheard:
As Allen was running down court someone faintly yelled,"Just let him slam, Ted!"
Other Highlights:
Allen foiled Lance's signature move at the end of the last game. Whenever Lance makes a basket or his team wins a game, he immediately makes a fist, brings his elbow towards his waist and shouts, "Yes!", in the same spirit of Tiger Woods. As he made the game winning basket and was about to go into his rehearsed finishing move, Allen slid underneath the basket and delivered it with the same enthusiasm even though his team lost.
Lissow
Alexandro
Devito
Nate
Scott(newcomer)
Allen
Moody
Luis
Dave
Randolf T.
Lance
Play of the Day:
Alexandro saddled up behind the three point line. Being a powerful scorer from that range, the opposing team stepped up their defense. Alexandro recieved a bad pass. Allowing Allen to steal the ball with his left hand and drive by on Alexandro's right side for a fast break-away to the other end of the court. With the speed and agility of the old Shaq moving down court, Allen awkwardly dribbled down to the unguarded basket. Alexandro was hot on his back. Allen slowed his pace as if a wizard had cast a Slow spell and he was wading his way through invisible molasses. He leaped from a two-footed jump stop, slam dunked the ball with two hands, hung on the rim, and yelled a battle cry at the same decibal of Wesley being tortured by the Six-Fingered Man in Princess Bride.
Overheard:
As Allen was running down court someone faintly yelled,"Just let him slam, Ted!"
Other Highlights:
Allen foiled Lance's signature move at the end of the last game. Whenever Lance makes a basket or his team wins a game, he immediately makes a fist, brings his elbow towards his waist and shouts, "Yes!", in the same spirit of Tiger Woods. As he made the game winning basket and was about to go into his rehearsed finishing move, Allen slid underneath the basket and delivered it with the same enthusiasm even though his team lost.
Monday, July 10, 2006
Game Week 26 | WORLD CUP
Attendence (pathetic):
Anderson
Ronnie
Fisch
Allen
Sanders
Highlights:
ABA got they're asses hand to them in a series four on four full court games with the locals.
They started off strong but the other team was a faster running team.
News:
ABA will resume the Hunter High School game at 11:30 for the next three Sundays.
Anderson
Ronnie
Fisch
Allen
Sanders
Highlights:
ABA got they're asses hand to them in a series four on four full court games with the locals.
They started off strong but the other team was a faster running team.
News:
ABA will resume the Hunter High School game at 11:30 for the next three Sundays.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Game Week 25 | STUYVESANT TOWN
Attendence:
Brett Anderson
Scott R
Moody
Allen
Dominick Dierkes
Dominick's Friend (??)
Dominick's Friend (Prince Valiant)
Random Stuyvesant Kids
Highlights:
Allen showed up at 1PM. An hour and half later than the scheduled time. He started his trek in Hoboken with the PATH train to 14th and 7th Avenue. There he went down to take the L train to 14th and 3rd to get to his car which he had parked the previous night on 12th Street between 2nd and 3rd Avenue. Unfortunately, he mistakenly jumped on the F train and had to transfer to the uptown train at the Broadway/Lafayette stop. He decided at that it would be best to get out at the Union Square station but somehow he managed to get out at 14th Street and 6th Avenue (only one avenue west of the PATH train entrance). Frustrated, he called Anderson, who was already at the courts, and told him he was running late. Allen finally got on the crosstown M14 bus to 3rd Avenue. He found his car, drove it east, and parked it between Avenue B and Avenue C. He grabbed his sports bag and headed for Stuyvesant Town. Allen walked onto the courts in jeans and dress shoes. He stripped down behind some bushes and changed into to his basketball gear. The ABA players were mildly annoyed by his tardiness but seem accepting of his excuse once they discovered it was because he was distracted by the attention of a female.
Brett Anderson
Scott R
Moody
Allen
Dominick Dierkes
Dominick's Friend (??)
Dominick's Friend (Prince Valiant)
Random Stuyvesant Kids
Highlights:
Allen showed up at 1PM. An hour and half later than the scheduled time. He started his trek in Hoboken with the PATH train to 14th and 7th Avenue. There he went down to take the L train to 14th and 3rd to get to his car which he had parked the previous night on 12th Street between 2nd and 3rd Avenue. Unfortunately, he mistakenly jumped on the F train and had to transfer to the uptown train at the Broadway/Lafayette stop. He decided at that it would be best to get out at the Union Square station but somehow he managed to get out at 14th Street and 6th Avenue (only one avenue west of the PATH train entrance). Frustrated, he called Anderson, who was already at the courts, and told him he was running late. Allen finally got on the crosstown M14 bus to 3rd Avenue. He found his car, drove it east, and parked it between Avenue B and Avenue C. He grabbed his sports bag and headed for Stuyvesant Town. Allen walked onto the courts in jeans and dress shoes. He stripped down behind some bushes and changed into to his basketball gear. The ABA players were mildly annoyed by his tardiness but seem accepting of his excuse once they discovered it was because he was distracted by the attention of a female.
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